Cleanup on Isle Six

Can cats hold a grudge? If you don’t do something they like or something they want you to do, do they plot and scheme to get back at you for your insubordination? Well, I am beginning to think they can and do practice the black art of payback. And we all now what paybacks can be. You would think that after saving his life that my cat would show a little more appreciation.

I have owned cats for pretty much all my life. What can I say, I like cats. I also like dogs, but this is a cat story so I will concentrate on them.

The cat that I want to talk about is one of the two cats that we currently employ as pets and pest removal engineers. His name is Jackie Chan, but we call him Kiki Boy or Kitty Boy. I know it is a rather creative nickname isn’t it? Anyway, six years ago, about a week before we moved from Missouri back to Arizona, while on our way to sell our station wagon in preparation for our move, one of my daughters decided it would be a perfect time to get sick in the van. My wife pulled over to the side of the road so that we could address the issue. We found ourselves in what seemed the middle of nowhere in farm country. We had no GPS at the time so we were relying on a map printed out on the computer to find the person who was going to purchase our car.

While we were standing about cleaning up the mess my daughter so kindly created, I heard a noise coming from just off the road. I walked in that direction and heard the sound again. It was the sound of a kitten. Out here in the middle nowhere, was a kitten. When I was in sight of it, he came trotting out from behind a bush right up to me, cute, six-week-old orange tabby. Since we were moving in a few days, we weren’t’ in the market for another pet. We had our large dog waiting at home for our return and didn’t need another pet to travel 1,500 miles with. But, he knew just how to work those sad eyes. Plus it had started to rain.

We couldn’t just leave him out there. I searched around and couldn’t find any mom or other litter mates. I discussed the matter with my wife and kids and we all agreed that we would take him home with us. And thus we saved his life.

Fast-forward six years to the other morning.

For some reason I woke up early when I could have slept in. Still being tired, I turned on my side to hopefully to catch a few more winks before my kids got up. I just happened to look out the doorway into the hall and saw Jackie Chan, aka Kiki Boy walk in the doorway of the bedroom. I then heard the dreaded sound that all cat owners fear. The “Cat Yack” sound.  Like watching a car or train wreck, I couldn’t turn away as I saw him go through the motions and deliver his gift on the carpet. Then he casually walked into my daughter’s room to finish the job and casually walk out and back down the hall.

What a little turd. He could have done his business anywhere in the house, downstairs on the tile floor where it would have been easier to clean up, but no, he had to come up stairs, walk to my doorway and throw up for me to step in.

I believe that at some point the previous day I offended him in some manner that he felt the need to get back at me. Otherwise why would he go through all that trouble to throw-up in my doorway? After saving his life, that is the thanks I get?

Fortunately I saw him setting up his little trap and avoided it. I have a sneaking suspicion though that next time, I won’t be so lucky. He is a smart cat and unlikely to make the same mistake twice. I see him watching me and paying attention to my sleep habits more closely now. I have given him an extra cat treat here and there as a distraction but I don’t think it is working. 

Mark my words, he will try again, probably sooner than later.